MARIAH SAY'S SHE DIDNT THINK SHE WAS GOING TO LIVE TO SEE 40!

After years of enduring personal and professional struggles, Mariah Carey finally feels at peace with herself.
"I have always been grateful for everything I had, but my personal life was a mess," the singer reveals in the new issue of In Touch Weekly. "So many artists just exist for their careers and then burn out quickly."

And that's exactly what happened to the Grammy Award winning songbird, who famously had a public meltdown in 2001 that included nonsensical rambling and an impromptu visit to MTV's TRL studios where Carey only wore a T-shirt while handing out popsicles to the audience on live TV.

Carey says it wasn't until she met her future husband, Nick Cannon, that she saw a reason to live a long life.

"Honestly, I never thought I'd live this long. I always thought that I wouldn't be here at this point. I was thinking, 'Okay, I've got another year of my life left. This has got to be the end of it,'" she revealed. “Finally, he was like, "Stop talking like that."

Having reached her milestone birthday this year, the 40-year-old singer appears to have everything going for her.

She has a highly-anticipated new album coming out, a buzz-worthy role in the movie “Precious," and the possibility of having children one day.

While Cannon claims two kids are the goal, Carey says, "Of course, we'd be happy with one. I want to be able to manage the right amount of attention. We are so busy - if you have six kids running around, no one gets what they need. Kids need a lot of attention."

Cannon reveals, "It's at the forefront of our minds. We're very close."