LMAO! PUNCH DRUNK LOVE ON JERSEY SHORE!

This most recent "Jersey Shore" episode asked the timeless question: How does one recover from a breakup? The answer, as it turns out, depends on the couple, since the hour consists of no fewer than three splits of varying drama. Here's the rundown on the night.
The Sam-Ron falling out takes center stage, since Sammi's nagging has become so intense it finally drives Ronnie to tears. J-Woww, of all people, offers Ronnie the olive branch and he accepts. Sammi can't bear the anguish of her boyfriend finding solace with her mortal enemy, and she finally cold-cocks Ronnie for this treachery. The scene is incredibly ironic given Ronnie's usually the one punching people. It would have been even better, too, if MTV hadn't spoiled it by making that punch the lynchpin of its promos for this week. Oh, well. Anyway, a despondent Sammi prepares to leave the house, but calls off her departure after an eleventh-hour reconciliation with Ron-Ron.

After being dumped/robbed by Tom, meanwhile, J-Woww declares that her true home is now at the shore house in Seaside. Well, at least she's moving to Italy soon. J-Woww then executes a slapdash, three-pronged plan to reclaim her independence. Step 1: She and Snooki change the locks on the Long Island house. It goes about as smoothly as you'd expect, suffice it to say that the process includes locking themselves inside the house and having to break the door open with a credit card before they've even put the new knob in. Step 2: J-Woww brings her puppies back to the Shore. The Situation is overjoyed and decides to take one as his apprentice in pimpin', until he finds out said dog is a female. Whoops. Step 3: J-Woww's road to recovery is the simplest, in that she sleeps with Roger the first chance she gets. Rebound!

Even Deena and Dean, aka The False Ronnie, have a mini-breakup of their own after he allegedly informs the roommates that Deena likes to do something so foul in bed that it literally cannot be spoken of on TV. Deena, of course, will not have her classiness called into such question, and promptly dismisses Dean the next time she sees him.

Meanwhile, Vinny doesn't quite have to deal with a breakup. But, he still spends the entire show in a state of constant sexual frustration. For one, Snooki's friend Ryder is visiting -- and having been forbidden to smush her, Vin can't really think of any other way to interact with the girl. Wow. Luckily, he later meets a cute Sicilian girl at Karma -- who is accompanied by her club-going uncle. Also, wow.

Still, Vinny's game is good enough that he gets this new girl to go home with him. The deal seems all but sealed -- until Uncle Buzzkill storms the Shore house and whisks his niece away. Suddenly out two prospects, Vinny seems just sad and confused.

Despite the romance troubles, the episode ends on an overwhelmingly (and satisfyingly) positive note: Sammi and J-Woww kiss and make up. Vinny and Pauly D debut the "Grenade Whistle," a vuvuzela horn repurposed to warn the house of unattractive women prowling about the premises. Sammi vows to be nice (at least till next week). And Vinny and Snooki install a stripper pole in the living room.

Let the healing begin.

LMAO! THIS NI**A RONNIE WEAR PANTIES & SAMMIE WEAR THE PANTS! LOL! BUT THERE'S TRULY SOMETHING WRONG WITH THIS! A WOMAN ONLY PUTS HER HANDS ON A MAN THAT SHE DON'T RESPECT! TRUST ME I KNOW! THAT NI**A RONNIE LIFT WEIGHTS EVERYDAY & IS BIG AS SH!T! HE WOULD PROBABLY FLIP ON ANY NI**A & HE LET HER JAP HIM IN THE FACE LIKE THAT! LOL! THESE DUDES BE SUCKER'S FOR THEIR HOES!


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