BEYONCE SHUTS DOWN SUPER BOWL XLVII

Beyoncé not only won Super Bowl XLVII, she killed it.

She shut the game down so much that minutes after her performance, play was discontinued due to a power outage in the Mercedes-Benz Superdome.

Beyoncé started the show with a video montage, sponsored by Pepsi, where celebrity- and fan-submitted photos flashed on the stadium television to create a countdown mosaic of the people of Beyoncé's queendom.

Feel that? That's the heat radiating from the on-stage pyrotechnics illuminating Beyoncé's legendary bootylicious silhouette. She started out in darkness, leaving prop bettors anticipating what color her top would be and how her hair would be styled.

Then, boom … lights go up, and she struts out in a lacy black PG-rated version of a dominatrix outfit with curls that have more bounce than Spalding. I'm sure her outfit and hair will be in stores and on your older sister by tomorrow.

She starts her set with Baby It's You, a shoutout to her hubby, Jay Z, who disappointed millions by not making a cameo. It's OK. We'll forgive you, Jay, but only if you perform at Super Bowl XLVIII

In an epic pop-culture moment, the world is introduced to the bootylicious “uh, oh” dance during Crazy In Love. That move goes up there with the moonwalk and the robot. I'll tell my kids about this.

The one trend throughout the show, as with most Bey shows, is Beyoncé has thighs for days. And not just her own. She could singlehandily solve the chicken-wing crisis in America with as much thigh meat as she had on stage from about 100 dancers during the Single Ladies performance. She even had Destiny's Child members Kelly Rowland and Michelle Williams flick their left hands for the Single Ladies choreography.

Audience members were given blue finger lights to be part of the show. But whatever effect was supposed to happen didn't translate well inside the Superdome. Those watching at home said the effect was strobe-like in nature. I'm sure it was breathtaking like every other aspect of her show.

From the Beyoncé lookalike, mirror trick, to the 100 hair flips and hip thrusts, Beyoncé served up celebrity royalty with a side of “hot damn, that was the best halftime show ever.”

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