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WHAT AN IDIOT! HOW ARE YOU GONNA STEAL FROM A PLACE AFTER YOU FILLED OUT AN APPLICATION?

You thought those Baltimorons who lifted Cal Ripken's No. 8 statue were going to remain your favorite dumb baseball thief story of the year?
Heh, not even close.

Not to be outdone at badly planned crimes that make the rest of us laugh, a Phillies fan has been charged with stealing three 2008 World Series rings from a Citizens Bank Park office during Thursday's Game 2 loss to the Rockies.

According to Philadelphia police, 22-year-old Matthew Mervine attended the game dressed as a masked "Rockies Killer" — the Philadelphia Inquirer actually took a picture of him — and was ejected by security officials during the game for acting too rowdy.

But instead of heading home, Mervine allegedly stole three World Series rings — valued at about $1,100 apiece — from a ballpark office. Police say they know this because a security camera caught him in the act shortly after he filled out a job application to work at the park.

Also filed as evidence? The job application Mervine left behind, complete with all of his contact information. Whoops!

Police say they later recovered the rings — which were made for team employees and cost substantially less than the $11K versions given to players — at Mervine's home. There's no word on whether he was still wearing the "Rockies Killer" mask when arrested (though I have a strong suspicion and hope that he was).

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